the hum de dums of life

So life has been just goin along here. I have been doin well at work and have been enjoying my social world as well. Within my world of romance I have been seemingly unable to make any sense of what it all means. I had my romance in Thailand and learned alot about myself and was doing great with how my ablility of "goin with the flow"-was goin, but as I have begun my time again back down here. I find myself questioning what I don't have again. I so want to be able to enjoy the company of another woman, one in particular, but just in general and as many times before they use the "I just got out of a relationship" card. This is quite understandable yet I find myself wondering why I do not get my fair share of seeing if I can make them happy. It seems as if that man before me has been my bridge and I do not even know him. Whether it be, he is too immature or he was a cheater or he is a violent man. All of these and many more reasons have been used upon me and myself. Why is it that woman see that in me, those potential qualities or elements, they seem to place all those burdons upon me and yet I have done nothing. I don't know, but the waiting game is all too excruciating sometimes. Sometimes it is fine and I am able to last those moments in between encounters but sometimes it ain't easy! Down here it seems that with the large population of beautiful, intelligent, kind, and amazing women, that I would have such luck, but in the end....... I don't know but I will seek that will and power to keep me goin along between encounters of the feminine kind! Till the next time!